OMD! Archives - Oh My Dog!

On finding time for pets, people, work, and fun…

09•07•17

Last night, Violet thumped her legs in her crib on and off all night long.

She wasn’t awake–at least, not until 4 am–but she spent the entire night lifting her chubby little legs and slamming them down. In her sleep. All night.

See, she’s still sleeping in the little crib in our room. SIDS-prevention recommendations now have infants sleep in their parents’ room until at least six months. So, of course, John and I got little sleep.

Newt and Cooper, who also sleep in our room, slept just fine in case you were wondering…

It’s now 7:15. We’ve been up for three hours. We’re on our second pot of coffee. My work hours haven’t even started yet.

And that’s our life these days… a sleepy, coffee-fueled haze! It’s worth every groggy moment, of course, but we’re still groggy.

What does that haziness mean for Cooper and Newt?

This is a question that’s preoccupied my attention for several days now, and a conversation with a friend helped clarify the predicament for me.

Backing up a step: There are different types of dog people. I think of it like a spectrum. On one end are people who have dogs, love them, and meet their basic needs every day. On the other end are, well, us. Me and you. We have dogs. We love them. We meet their basic needs every day. And then we go above and beyond as much and as often as we can. We enroll in training classes and play dog sports. We research and read and test and train and repeat until we’re confident–or, as confident as we can possibly get–that we’re providing our loves with the best, happiest life. It has nothing to do with how much we spend on them, but rather the dedication to ensuring their physical and emotional lives are taken care of.

Now that we have our hands extra full, I keep asking myself: How can I continue to be the dog (and cat) mama who still always goes above and beyond for Coop (and Newt)?

Ultimately, it came down to one question: How do I want to spend my time?

{{Aside: It’s now the next day. I wrote all that yesterday. She woke up at 4 again today. Send coffee.}}

Anyway, time.

The only answer to that question, in my mind, was I want to spend my time having fun with my family.

Except for one huge change that might be coming later today (another story for another day… but it’s a good one…), we’re simplifying everything that took up unnecessary time and funneling that time into family time. For instance, we realized we were spending a huge chunk of our Saturday cleaning and tidying the house, so we hired a lovely woman to come do the deep cleaning stuff every other week. That bought us the time to take a hike every single Saturday morning.

We go through a ton of laundry detergent, so I got a subscription to the eco-friendly powder I love so that I never have to go online and reorder. It just magically arrives right as we’re about to run out. We are also testing out a weekly box of meals, which has saved more time than I imagined, not just in the cooking (everything is already measured out and organized) but in trips to the grocery store. Same thing with work clothes. John and I both work from home but have travel and events throughout the year, so we only need a few clothing items annually, so we signed up for a quarterly box of styled work clothes. (If you’re interested in more detail about either of those services, let me know in the comments, and I’m happy to share all our thoughts!)

All that means is that we can spend our evenings playing Recall Relay in the backyard with Coop. It means we can go for a family walk or jog almost every day. It means we can take Newt out on her line after work almost every day, and it means we can go to the library with Violet every Sunday.

Of course, none of that means that things are easy. Or that we’ve made our life simple. It’s still a complex jugging act in which I’m constantly dropping balls. We still have our work days and work travel, and we have lots of other community and family obligations, time with friends, and so on. Oh, and the big (actually… tiny…) thing that might happen this afternoon…

But, I think my new mantra in life is, “Progress, not perfection.”

I’m doing my best to still be the Cooper and Newt mama who goes above and beyond for them every day, and I’d like to think they know that…

How do YOU simplify??

Every new subscriber to both the meal box and the clothing box automatically get a referral link to share. That means if you click on these and subscribe, we both get money off. (If you’re interested in more detail about either of those services, let me know in the comments, and I’m happy to share all our thoughts!)

StitchFix: This link gets you $25 off!

Purple Carrot: This link also gets you $25 off!

Dear Cooper

08•21•17

Yesterday, Coop, you turned seven.

How that’s possible… I still can’t wrap my mind around it…

But, it’s true, and here we are. Today, you are a seven-year-old pup. “Middle aged.”

I say “middle aged” in quotes because you, my dear Cooper, did not get the #adulting memo. Or, maybe it’s that you’re taking the phrase, “age is nothing but a number,” in its most literal sense. You are a wild child at heart, and hitting this middle age hasn’t slowed you down one bit.

In fact, now that you’re in this phase of life, we have to slow you down. We’re being so careful with your muscles and joints because there is nothing you love more than going full-out, full-tilt top speed. We’ve started you on a joint supplement regimen and are trying to lift you in and out of the car instead of letting you hop up and down, which you’re not super happy about, but you go along with it with your usual stoicism.

There are a few immutable facts about you, Coop. The athleticism, sure. Also, your brilliance. You’re the smartest pup we’ve ever known, which has gotten you into a lot of trouble over the years, but it’s pushed us to become better dog trainers. I learned so much from Emmett and Lucas, of course, and you’ve just opened up a whole new world for me on how to partner with a dog.

In a lot of ways, this is one of the harder letters I’ve written to you because it’s the first one where you’ve been alone.

Not, of course, alone alone. You’re not all by yourself, not even a little.

You are always with me. You adore Violet. You love John. You and Newt even have a really special, really funny friendship.

But, you’re still more alone than you’ve ever been. You’re alone without any brothers.

This is the first time in your life you’ve been without at least one, most often two, and–for a short while–three, dogs around you at all times. We had no idea what this would be like for you, Cooper, and we worried and fretted and thought of all sorts of accommodations to make sure that even if you felt alone, you never felt lonely.

Well, as in almost all things, you rose to the occasion. In some respects, you’re thriving as the “only” dog.

You love having all our attention. With only one dog to manage, you get to go more places with us more often, more than ever before. And some of your less-desirable behavior quirks are starting to get worked out. You get the best spot on the couch and at the foot of the bed. You get to go on all the walks, no more trading off.

But we can see how much you miss having a dog around. You try so hard to get the neighbor’s dog to play along the fence line (even though, to me, he sounds kinda like a jerk… you seem to dig him…), and you go bananas whenever you get to see Otto or Cady.

I think that’s part of the reason why I struggled with this letter, to be honest. Most often, these letters recap the last year, all the highs and lows and progress. Your last year has been one of upheaval. The ground was never steady, and sometimes you got lost in the fray of Emmett’s declining health and the adoption process John and I were working through.

Losing Emmett was so hard for all of us, and we’re still finding our equilibrium. And Violet, while the most wonderfully amazing thing to ever happen, is still hard because a new baby affects sleep and schedules and routines.

Oh, but you love Violet. Since the first day she came home, you’ve been smitten. You check on her and lick her cheek. You lay by her when she does tummy time, and when we get home from running errands, the first thing you do is run over to her carrier to check on her… wagging your tail and sniffing her all over.

You’ve been amazing since the moment you laid eyes on her.

But I stick on the question: Do you need another dog to be your happiest?

I don’t know the answer. I do know that we’re not ready to add another pup right now. But when I watch you get so excited to play with another dog, there’s no question it tugs at my heart.

So, your last year, Cooper… well, I don’t have anything really to document. No training progress. No goals we were working toward or behaviors we were working on. No big trips or adventures. We were all just getting through the day.

And, the thing is, I had you right by my side every single step of the way. You have not once left my side. In fact, you’re here right now, dozing in the dog bed right next to my desk.

Among those immutable facts about you, Coop, is this one: You are the most reliable, loyal friend a girl could ever ask for.

I’m so lucky to have you right here with me, and I promise to do a better job this year, your eighth, making sure you have fun, making sure you’re challenged, and making sure you’re happy–whatever that looks like.

Happy birthday, dear Cooper.

And just remember: No matter how old you get, you will always, always be my Baby Bean.

Parents, pets, pics… and the social media fallacy

07•27•17

Last week, John’s brother, sis-in-law, and two kiddos–ages 4 and 7–visited from Maryland to meet Violet.

Cooper loved having guests, primarily because the 7-year-old was willing to play Cooper’s favorite game, “Chase me but don’t catch me!”

He picks up a toy and runs. He loves to be pursued. He doesn’t really want to be caught. Our nephew was more than happy to chase Cooper–legit trying to catch him, I think, but Cooper is fast and pretty wily–around the house in circles for three straight days.

The kids were obsessed with Newt, too. I’ve noticed kids become fascinated by her. She’s a mysterious little critter, which captivates children. Newt, of course, does not feel the same way.

By the time they left, our three little herd members were wiped. (As was I!)

One thing totally stuck with me, though, that I’ve been thinking about since Saturday. Sitting around chatting with my sister in law, she mentioned how when she was a new parent, she felt like no one was talking about the tough parts, which makes it feel like you’re the only one struggling. (“My kid can’t be the only kid in the world who never, ever, ever sleeps?!”) And, she pointed out, social media makes it so. much. worse.

Everyone puts their glossiest foot forward.

The perfectly-posed holiday photo (subtly matching plaid woven throughout the outfits, obvi), the pet sitting nicely in his Halloween costume, and then–of course–the styled “silly” photo that’s portrayed as an “outtake.”

Right.

Fast forward to Monday afternoon.

The weather was perfect, so we figured we’d take Cooper and Violet to the nearby trails for an evening hike.

A decent-enough pic.

I started to post it on Instagram (“Fun family hike!”), and then I remembered the conversation with my sister-in-law and changed my mind.

Why?

Well, for starters, when we got to the park and parked, Violet spit out her pacifier, and I didn’t notice, so we started to walk without it. The horror.

Also, we weren’t 10 feet from the car when Cooper dove head first into a whole lotta poison ivy. John’s super allergic, so getting the potential oil off of Cooper became a Thing, which meant were weren’t in motion, which meant Violet started to cry.

And cry.

So, we got going, only to stop literally another 10 feet further down for Cooper to have a sort of “off” poo.

By this time, we’ve gone back to the car three times: once for wipes to clean up Cooper, once for Violet’s pacifier, and once for wipes to clean up Cooper.

Once we got on the actual trail, I had to put Violet’s sun hat on her because it was still SO sunny, and that was, apparently, the last straw.

She. lost it.

As did Cooper at about the exact same second because from the two trails shooting off from the main one we were on, dogs appeared. Coming at us from both trails. At the same time.

That’s it. We’re done.

We walk back to the car, and I mentioned that I had wanted to get a hiking pic. Sigh.

So, we posed that one literally standing in front of the car. In the parking lot.

Then we drove home.

In total, we were in the car longer than we were at the park.

A couple weeks ago, a friend had said something like, “How are you keeping it all together?”

Answer: I’m not.

No one is!

But social media sort of makes you feel like everyone else has it altogether, you know? Because you know your stuff is hanging by a thread, but then you open Facebook, and it breeds comparison… but, really, you’re comparing your truth to someone else’s glossy post.

Anyway, random thoughts, but in the spirit, I’d like to share the Fourth of July pic we got this year! And here I am sharing it on July 27! Only a mere 23 days late. And, also, it’s this:

So.

Yeah.

Happy Fourth, y’all.

On starting a new chapter

06•27•17

A couple weeks ago, John stood in the laundry room folding yet another pile of teeny-tiny onesies while I cleaned the kitchen.

Seemingly out of the blue, he turned to me and asked, “Are you ever going to write about Emmett? All the stuff at the end?”

I answered as honestly as I could. “It’s too hard.”

And it is. It still is.

The thing is, the end has to be separated from the rest. The end was like all ends: sad, painful, not unexpected, but entirely surprising. He had terminal cancer. He didn’t die of terminal cancer.

His decline happened so fast.

Degenerative myelopathy.

That was the diagnosis, and maybe I’ll write about that some day and share our experience because sometimes first-hand helps when you’re going through something so significant, but that’s the part that needs to be detached from the rest. Right now, it’s too hard. It’s not what I wanted for him. He deserved better.

I miss him.

That is the singular, simple truth: I miss Emmett.

When John and I had that conversation, one of the things I said was that I was struggling to write blog posts. My role here is to tell our stories, for better or for worse, but I lost the thread. Without Em, I don’t know what the story is anymore. It all started with him. He was Chapter One.

Of course, it’s the same story, just a much later chapter.

Right now, in fact, it’s 10:27 PM. I’m sitting on the floor of the living room with my laptop, just waiting for Violet to wake up. She needs one more bottle then she’ll sleep until 5 or 6 am, so I’m waiting.

Newt buried herself under the comforter when John went to bed.

Cooper… well… Cooper alternates. Some nights, he’s so exhausted from his long day of Violet-minding that he crashes as soon as his head buries under the covers. Other nights, he can’t let his guard down and waits up until it’s really time for her to go down.

And I think that’s where we are right now: The Cooper Chapter.

Maybe I’ll write about degenerative myelopathy someday.

But, for now, there’s so much to tell about Cooper. He’s changing so much, you guys. We had a day at the park, this past Sunday, when there were zero freak-outs. Not a one. And there were lots of people there! (OK, no dogs, but… we’ll take what we can get.) His recall has become rock-solid, and he’s taking his job of Violet’s watch dog seriously.

So, even though I’m still. so. sad. and a big part of me still won’t accept that my Emmett is gone, I am super excited on Cooper’s behalf to be turning the page and diving into his chapter.

It’s going to be a good one.

Healthy dog, healthy you… and the converse is true, too!

06•05•17

I’m granting myself some leniency here because it’s been a helluva couple months. However.

{{This post brought to you by Cooper getting up and peeing in the living room at 4 AM! If that hadn’t happened, I’d still be languishing lazily in my bed, you know, sleeping instead of writing this post! Thanks, Coop! Way to keep me on task, buddy!}}

Several years ago, I alllllmost completed the C25K training program. It’s a really great program that takes you from not being able to run at all to completing a 5K incrementally and pretty gently. I derailed at the end and kept meaning to start back up but then winter.

Anyways, I know that’s no excuse. So, summer 2016 I repeated the whole program with Cooper. He loved it. We finished it. I ran TWO 5Ks in 2016 and tried to keep up with twice- or thrice-weekly jogs.

Then I derailed in early March. No “winter” excuse this time since that’s when things start getting nicer here in Indiana.

Here’s the truth that we all know yet sometimes struggle to accept:

Exercise is super good for us. It’s super good for our dogs. It’s super good for our bond with our dogs when we exercise together.

The only drawbacks with exercise? It takes time, and it’s hard.

And both of those things–individually or together–are enough to derail the best-laid plans.

Which leads us to today.

Well, actually, yesterday…

Yesterday, Sunday, June 4: The Healthy Dog, Healthy You Challenge kicked off.

Started by my friend Alison at Sarcastic Dog, the challenge inspires us all to walk with our dogs for 30 days in a row. Here’s her post announcing and explaining the initiative: Getting Healthy… Again.

There are prizes (yay!) and a fundraising initiative for Best Friends (double yay!), and you can sign up and get those bullet points and some additional detail here: The Second Annual 30-Day Walk the Dog Challenge & Giveaway! Plus, there’s a Facebook group to connect and compare!

Also–because you KNOW I’m obsessed–my friend Jodi at Kol’s Notes made an ahhhhmazing sticker set for your planner to go with the challenge. Legit, nothing motivates me quite like stickers do!! Check out her post here: The Healthy Dog; Healthy You Challenge (and Free Printable Stickers) and download the free stickers! I’m working on cutting mine out and pasting them into my planner this morning… since I have all this extra time… Cooper.

Want the quick PDF download? Here ya go!

Anyway, for the launch of the program, yesterday I ended up doing a TON of yard work and was totally beat, but Cooper hadn’t gotten any exercise. So, John and I decided to do an after-dinner family walk around the neighborhood. I put Violet in the wrap, and John harnessed Cooper (with can of cheese in tow) and off we went. We hit the 15-minute mark, which feels like a win since that was the challenge… but I know we can do better. So, I set a goal: I signed myself up for another 5k on June 24, so I better stick with it, huh? That’s only three weeks away!

Heck, the sun still isn’t up yet (COOPER), so I might as well round everyone up for an early-morning jog, huh?

How about you? Are you doing the Healthy Dog, Healthy You challenge? Do you have any summer fitness plans or goals? I’d love to hear them and share progress so we can help inspire and motivate each other!!!