dogs and cats Archives

Lessons

01•26•18

I’m not someone who believes that everything happens for a reason.

We can debate that over a glass of wine sometime, but I truly think the world is full of chance and randomness.

I do, however, believe that there is a purpose to every single thing that happens. In most cases, that purpose is to teach a lesson.

Lately, I’ve been feeling incredibly sad. I’m not going to dive into a whole political debate (see aforementioned glass of wine), but the state of affairs these days is disheartening at best. Combine that with daily stress, work stress, few consecutive hours of sleep, and all those other pressures we all face day in and day out, and I’ve been feeling run down. Beat up. Burnt out.

And that’s just not me.

So, I did what I always do in these low moments: I turned to my herd.

And I started to think about all the lessons they’ve each taught me along the way, and I was reminded just how flipping lucky I am and how grateful I feel every single day. Now, Violet could earn herself her very own post for all my gratitudes (OMG, you guys, she now has FOUR TEETH and she gives kisses! KISSESSSSS!), but I’m focusing on the furry herd for today.

I’d love to hear from you, too, about what lessons you’ve learned from your pets along the way. Good, bad, scary, ugly, poopy (often literally), what have you learned from the pets who have graced your life?

Here are a few of mine:

Emmett taught me about open-heartedness. He never met a stranger. Did I ever tell you about the time the significantly-inebriated woman stumbled up to us shouting and yelling and falling all over herself? She propped herself up on a fire hydrant and stared at us. Emmett stood there. He stared back at her, just wagging his tail, until she sort of calmed down and then stumbled away. I was anxious, tbh, but he was just like, “Look! A lady! Let’s be friends!” He taught me that kindness for the sake of kindness should be the rule of the day, and it makes everyone happier to be around kindness. And that stubborn mule taught me patience beyond measure. I love him for that.

Lucas taught me to look far beyond the surface of someone to truly understand and relate to them. What you see as toughness or fear or anger or aggression or defensiveness on the outside very often masks a deep pool of sensitivity. Looking beyond that mask is the only way to really understand someone. He taught me that, no matter what’s on the outside and whether it’s authentic or not, the soul never lies. He taught me to dig in and dig deep, and to laugh always, but especially when you do something naughty. I love him for that.

Cooper taught me about limits. He taught me to understand limits, but he also showed me the value of stretching them a little bit now and again. Just when I start to consider a situation from the “oh, Cooper could never do that” angle, he proves me wrong. We work together and learn together every single day, and he reminds me again and again the most important lesson about limits: They don’t define you. He may not ever be a restaurant-patio dog, and that’s fine. He’s a running dog, a backyard-chase dog, a hiking dog, a Violet-minding dog, a kitten-loving dog, a fun-loving-ball-chasing-trick-learning-snuggle-giving-kissing dog. His limits aren’t who he is–no one’s are. I love him for that.

Newt taught me that you always, always have to be you. Unwavering, unapologetic, authentic, and true to yourself and your spirit. She is just so Newt all the time. With her, you know what you’re going to get in just about every scenario, even if that means having your hand nipped because she wants to sit on your keyboard right now, thank you very much, so you can work later. She lives an authentic life. I love her for that.

Ripley… well, Ripley’s lessons are still unfolding, but I can say this: Ripley taught me that there’s no reason ever not to have fun. So far, that seems to be her life’s work: to have fun. We’ll see as she gets older, but her goal in life is to enjoy every moment of it. If there’s a second of downtime, she snatches a toy and dashes around the house with it in her mouth. If anyone pets her, her purrs start at full force. You’re brushing your teeth? You better believe she’ll be sitting in the sink playing with the faucet or the cap to the toothpaste! I love her for that.

There’s so much more to learn from them, you know? This is just scratching the surface, but they’re certainly the highlights that sprang to mind for each of my little furry charges. I think, no matter how each day unfolds, the reality is that I’m incredibly grateful to have these idiots to keep me grounded and in the moment.

How about you? What lessons have you learned from your pets, past or present? Please do share them in the comments! I can’t wait to read them!

Caturday Catch Up

06•20•15

Two years ago this week, the boys and I arrived in Louisiana. So, we’ve been back to Indiana just a bit shy of a year. My, how time flies.

Anyway, two years ago right now, I was obsessing over how to get the dogs and Newt integrated. I wrote this whole post about the Newt Plan: Introducing cats and dogs. And, for the most part, it worked. Cooper and Newt got along well at first; they just needed to iron out the kinks in their communication. Newt loved Emmett almost immediately because Emmett pretended she didn’t exist. And Lucas, well, Lucas tried to eat Newt on and off for about six months.

Newt recently reminded me that I promised her a regular “Caturday” post so that she’d at least get some of the attention on the blog. Perfect timing for a “Caturday Catch Up” as we hit the two-year mark of introducing her to the dogs.

So, how are they doing today?

Pretty great, huh? Even Lucas and Newt occasionally find themselves reclining together! I also included Cady because Newt was just kind of like, “Oh, another one? She’s cool.” the very first day they met!

There are tiny disagreements every now and again. Like, Newt thinks it’s the Best Game Ever to crouch down on the bed, then spring up when Coop jumps into bed and bite him in the butt. Cooper doesn’t agree that the game is all that fun, and he sometimes squashes her with his paw. She plays with Emmett’s tail non-stop, which he ignores the vast majority of the time, though sometimes he gets annoyed and huffs away.

Cats.
A video posted by Maggie Marton (@maggiemarton) on May 12, 2015 at 5:01am PDT

Overall, though, two years later, the herd is getting along famously. Thank goodness.

And Newt is happy that I’m finally resurrecting Caturday, what she considers to be her column. Ha.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Lennie

09•15•14

Well, it happened. Newt maimed one of the boys. (OK. OK. Not maimed. Scratched.)

And, of course, it was Lucas.

We don’t know what happened. Everyone was hanging out, there was a scuffle, then his ear was bleeding. Frankly, I’m astounded that it took this long for it to happen.

But what’s even more astounding about this whole Newt/Lucas situation is that, from the very beginning, his behavior toward Newt has been so uncharacteristic.

Yes, he’s reactive to dogs on leash. But otherwise? Lucas is the Gentle Giant. He’s great with puppies and adores small dogs. Anytime there’s a baby nearby, he immediately steps into Guard Dog mode, pausing only to ensure that the baby’s nose is still cold and wet. He earned the nickname Lennie (remember Of Mice and Men?) because he’s killed a few small animals… but not by actively trying to kill them. Rather, he accidentally killed a vole in my parents’ backyard because he was trying to scoop it with his paws. He sealed the nickname when did the same thing with a wayward baby bunny.

Before we introduced the dogs to Newt, we predicted that Lucas would love her best.

Huh.

Obviously, though, we’re miles beyond where we were with the two of them a few months ago. Periodically, I discover them napping within a couple feet of each other. On rare occasions, Newt tries to chew on Lucas’ tail – which she does with the other two – but he usually gets up and walks away as soon as she tries. And, no one has to be separated when we leave the house. Free reign for all!

I imagine that there’s always some tension when you throw dogs and cats together. They’re just so different! But, she and Cooper are the best of friends, and she and Emmett have come to an “I ignore you, you ignore me” agreement.

Newt and Lucas… it’s still tense and strained, though not all the time. Those good moments… whew! Heart-melting!

Either way, this situation has been an incredible teacher for me. I think because I felt like I “knew” their personalities so well, I could make predictions like, “Lucas will love Newt,” forgetting that Lucas is his own dog. It’s been a solid reminder to take things as they come and not take their idiosyncrasies for granted. (Now, I just need to apply this lesson to Cooper and the new-found terror of the car…)

It’ll never cease to amaze me just how much I learn from my dogs.

What about you? Has your dog taught you anything lately?

Finding your why

06•26•14

At some point during Emmett’s road trip, someone asked me in a totally offhanded way why I write a dog blog.

My response was something like: …… um….. it’s fun?

But, laying it all out, that isn’t entirely true.

Don’t get me wrong. Some days are super fun.

But then there are those days when I’m drawing a blank and can’t think of what to write and I don’t have a camera so I can’t just post a beautiful pic and do I have time to walk all the dogs and switch around the cats and oh my I need to do some job work to pay the bills and I’m fairly sure the dog fur is forming a giant dog fur monster in some un-swept corner of the house that will soon take over and devour us all if I don’t finally make the time to clean. And then there are the mean comments and critical emails and the spam attacks and the weird break-in attempts from IP addresses in the Ukraine and have I updated all my social accounts today?

I guess what I’m trying to say is that the out-of-the-blue question wasn’t something I ever actually considered. I just keep plugging away here, but never thought about why. Why do I do what I do?

Well, there’s this:

And this:

And miracles like this:

Lest I leave out these two:

And, yes, they’re cute and funny and do silly things. They have behavioral and health issues that have given me enough stories that I can probably keep this blog running for another 10 years on that alone.

But the biggest thing – and I’m fairly confident that this is my why – is that none of them have a voice. And it’s my job to give them a voice.

I had shaken off that why question, but with all the crap from the beginning of the week, combined with near-total-burn-out this week from work and general life overwhelm, the question kept resurfacing. And I’m grateful that it did because it reminded me of my why.

What’s your why?

Turns out, positive reinforcement works

06•05•14

Which we all know, of course, but we had a HUGE reminder of just how well positive reinforcement works earlier this week.

But first – flash back to last summer. I had just moved to Louisiana with the three dogs. We worried about them (Cooper, in particular) meeting Newt. Emmett couldn’t care less about it, pretty much from the first moment. Cooper, to our immense surprise, decided she was his best friend ever, and the two haven’t stopped playing since. Lucas… well, it was about as bad as it could’ve been. He wanted to eat her. So, six months of daily positive training, a whole bunch of setbacks, then a few leaps forward, and today, the three boys and Newt are fully integrated, even when we leave the house! Even out in the yard!

Enter, Petey.

We had her isolated for a few days, but as her fleas disappeared and as she started to get bolder (and bored of being in the bathroom), we decided to dive right into Petey/dog training. We figured that if we got Petey socialized to the dogs while she was still an impressionable youth, it would go better.

So, how did it go?

We’ll get to that. But… Let me say that we made one mistake. After the first round we realized that we should have let the boys into the bathroom one at a time to sniff all of Petey’s things and the space. They never go into that bathroom, so it’s an unfamiliar space and all her scents mixed with the novelty. We sort of just expected them to focus from the outset, but we should have let them drink in the room’s smells first. But, we learn from our mistakes! Every time they’ve done “Petey training” since that first night, we’ve held Petey while they run around and sniff like crazy.

Ok, so here’s how it went:

Emmett just didn’t care. He got super annoyed because she kept leaping up and grabbing onto his legs, biting his ankles, and chewing on his tail. He kept flicking her off, like she was an annoying little gnat. When he started to give us The Look, we knew it was time to call it. It’s been the same every time we’ve taken him visiting.

Cooper wanted to PLAY. Immediately.

He took one look at her and was like, “OK! You look like fun! You can be my second best friend!” We tried to keep him from getting too rowdy because she is so small and he could really hurt her. He did a decent down/stay while we let her wander all around, but he got very frustrated, crying and snuffling. We’re giving him a bit more freedom than that first night but still closely monitored.

So, the big question: How did Lucas do?

We started with him very conservatively. I held Petey. John brought Lucas into the bathroom and asked for a down. He got out the cheese and started rewarding for calm behavior. Once he looked around the room and realized I was holding the kitten, he started to whine a bit. John set the kitten on his lap, and we increased the rate of reward.

BUT!! He did EXACTLY what we trained with Newt! That is, he looked at Petey for a second or two, then IMMEDIATELY did a watch-me on his own without being cued!!!! I know this is a lot of CAPS!!! And EXCLAMATIONS!!! BUT!!!! He did it exactly right from the outset. Check out this watch me!

We’ve done a few more visits, giving him a little bit more freedom each time. We’re keeping the sessions super short because he’s still really whiney, which means he’s not entirely comfortable yet. But, whoo!! All that work with Newt totally set him up for success with Petey. I’m so proud of how hard Lucas has been working, and I’m thrilled that those six months of training had such a direct baring on this situation.

Next steps: Visits with Petey in a room other than the bathroom, a space that’s more “the dogs'” space. Then, we’ll do two dogs at a time, until we can work up to all three. Hopefully we can get them rock solid before she’s off her quarantine so that we can focus all our attention on introducing Petey and Newt! (Which, btw, I’m terrified about… I have zero experience with this.)

Have you had any training successes to celebrate? Leave the in the comments so I can cheer on your victories, too! I just love when we can see training work!!!