That’s the only question these days, and it doesn’t have a straightforward answer.
He’s great: He loves our micro-hikes and fast food trips. He loves friends dropping by with beef stew, cheese, bacon treats, and snuggles. Lots and lots of snuggles. He loves taking super slow strolls with lots of long pauses around the block. Then, he sleeps and sleeps and sleeps.
He’s exhausted: He’s never been so tired. He has spurts of fun, happy, joyful moments followed by long, totally zonked naps.
He’s himself: He’s silly and obstinate. He snipes across the street at dogs who look at him funny. He wrestles daily with Cooper. Like this:
He’s not himself: His gums started to bleed a bit. The oncologist thinks that’s perhaps a sign of the osteo cropping up in his jaw because it isn’t a side effect of his medicine. He doesn’t seem to be in pain; he still chews his bone and plays tug with Cooper, but we switched him to a mostly canned food diet, just in case his teeth are sore. And the occasional turkey cheeseburger and grilled asparagus…
How’s Lucas? Mostly, entirely good. He’s happy. He’s having fun. He’s playful and spirited and still refuses to come when called. He’s feeling it, though, and we’re struggling not to grieve. It’s truly an odd thing, grieving the living. It’s exhausting.
In the meantime, I’m pretty much offline. I do my work, teach my class, then spend time with my herd. I turned notifications off on my phone (I HIGHLY recommend this… I didn’t think it would be that big of a deal… it’s life changing) so that I could stay focused in the moment.
How’s Lucas? Great today, but all we can do is take it one day, one step, one hop at a time.
You have it right, one step at a time, sometimes forward and sometimes tumbling backwards……we always do land back on our feet. Hugs stella rose and momma
Sweetness!! He does look happy!! We do what we can for them while we have them <3
Maggie, I think about you guys ALL the time. Thank you for the update. As weird as it sounds, it’s probably the best you can hope for given the reality. You are a shining example to me on how to face gut punching issues with grace, humor and love. I wish you many many slobbery kisses!
That’s how we’re doing it, too – one moment, one step, at a time. It’s the only way I can do it without totally losing what little bit is left of my mind.
I’m glad Lucas is still enjoying life as much as he possibly can. The longer he can hold onto that “I’m gonna beat this thing” attitude, the better off he’ll be. And you, too.
I’ve been thinking of you guys, keeping you all in my prayers. Email or message me if you need someone to talk to, or a shoulder to cry on, or anything.
Awwww… what a sweet boy. Sending love, wags, and kisses your way!
Thanks for keeping us posted. I’m thinking of you all and praying for you as well.
It’s so hard not to do the “pre-grieving” thing. I kept reminding myself, “there will be plenty of time for that later!” The shutting off the notifications thing is genius. Enjoy every second. It’s good that he’s happy and enjoying his special treats.
Be sure to get photos of all of you together! Since I was always the one behind the camera, I was really glad that someone recommended that, since I had very few pics of me and Abby. I love the photos we have of our whole familial unit together.
I know exactly what it means grieving the living. My “work pup” has congestive hart failure and now one side is enlarged. There’s only one direction for her health to go, so every ”bad” day sparks grieving. I try hard to remember she’s still here, and to appreciate each day I have left with her as a ”gift”. Knowing doesn’t make it any easier, that’s for sure.
Get all the moments you can; We’ll be here when you need us.
I’ve never experienced pre grieving, but I can’t even imagine how exhausting it must be. Lucas looks awesome & happy, and I’m thinking of you.
Bittersweet post. He and you are both making the most of a very tough situation. Enjoy the time you have together.
Lots of love to you all! and Enjoy every minute!
We think of you often and send love unendingly.
Thank you so much for the update. You are dealing with a lot, and it has to be so, so stressful and yes, exhausting. But it’s good to know that Lucas is still enjoying life as much as he can and that you are all making precious memories. Hang in there and know that we are always thinking of you.
I’ve got folks that are perpetually mad at me for not answering on the first ring – we aren’t slaves to the phone or e-mail. After all, isn’t that why answering machines were made?
We are thinking of you. Hugs and love…
Monty and Harlow
(((Hugs))) One day at a time.
“Grieving the living” is the best description I have ever heard for this situation.
It is an absolutely, perfect phrase for an incredibly, unbearable circumstance..
Your strength and grace come through with every word you write.
I have been through this with three of my dogs and ten of my cats in the last forty-seven years.
Unfortunately, I understand how difficult this is and my heart goes out to you.
I keep you and your lovely family in my prayers everynight and I wish there were something more I could do except send you good wishes .
May love bring you peace, and many good days to remember.
Maggie, I too have had to “unfortunately” experience living with loved pets (members of our family) knowing that they had an incurable illness. One of the many wonderful traits about dogs is that they don’t know. They just go right on living, loving, and wrestling with their friends. Lucas doesn’t know about his gums, he just feels the love that you and John are showering on him and this makes him happy. Each day I pray for Lucas and for your strength in dealing with your circumstances. Thanks for the update. Love to your family.
I guess that your dogs are very active. They like discipline like human beings. Thanks for sharing photos.
~Dr. Diana Hardy
You guys have been on our minds, good to know that your beautiful Lucas is holding is own. With all those medicinal naps, he’s bound to continue kicking ass.
Love that boy, give him a million smooches from the Tripawds Nation. xoxo
One thing I forgot to mention:
YOU maut be an amazing trainer to get a photo, no less, of 2 dogs with that delicious-looking dinner sitting right within reach of BOTH of them, and they’re looking at the CAMERA instead of fighting over who gets two dinners and who gets NONE! OMG!
Please tell us your secret, even if it’s only that you have wonderfully behaved fur-kids and most of us have food-sharks. lol
A setting like that would cause WW3 at my house, and a trip to the Vet-ER.
Your boys are awesome. 🙂