It’s pretty fitting that Cooper’s post is a day late.
Poor Cooper.
So many of you kind souls have asked how Coop’s doing with all that’s going on. In some ways, he’s amazing–doing better than I ever could have thought he could do. Home alone for short periods? Nailed it. Doggy daycare without a brother with him? Nailed it. The big one: Boarding for a weekend all by himself? Nailed it! Hiking without his brothers? Eh, I wouldn’t say “nailed it,” but he did alright.
I’m proud of him, and I think these past few months have given him the opportunity to find his own voice, so to speak.
That said, it hasn’t been all achievements and strides for this little bean.
Here’s the thing about Cooper: He is extremely bright. Honestly, he’s probably a bit too smart for us. He reads us perfectly, and he often uses that to his advantage. He’s a pro at reading our faces, and we test him sometimes but he never fails. He’s also very sensitive to every sensory detail around him. I think those two facts about his personality–his intelligent and his sensitivity–combine to make him reactive and to make him into a little Velcro strip on my pant leg.
When he reacts to anything, it’s a meltdown. On our walk today, a deer ran across the street, and he started yelping and crying and barking and flailing so loudly that the people at the playground far, far on the other side of the park stopped playing to turn and look to see who was killing a dog in the middle of the street.
All that said, here’s where the problem has been: Immediately after Lucas came home from his amputation, Cooper and Emmett started to get in fights. Not, like, snipes during a game of bite-face that gets too rough. Not corrections, either, like Emmett used to do when Coop was a puppy. All-out, up on their hindlegs fights that don’t fizzle on their own–we have to pull them apart. No real injuries, thank goodness, which shows they’re inhibiting themselves at least a bit, but definite clumps of missing fur and a bitten tongue here and there.
It’s not often. I think since April, they’ve been in a total of maybe six? And, frankly, we haven’t been looking at them at the moment of ignition, so Emmett could be doing something? Though that seems unlikely. Oddly, the fights have all been at meal-time. I say “oddly” because these dogs have never, ever, ever been resource guarders among each other. Never. They can take toys from each other. They snatch up bits of treat crumbles right out of each other’s mouths. We have never had a resource-guarding issue before. Could it be coincidence that this has happened at meal time? Maybe. Someone suggested that Cooper’s maybe unsure of his place now that both big boys are sick, but I don’t subscribe to pack theory and I sort of feel like his role as the spoiled baby hasn’t changed. Who knows.
You know by now that I can’t let problems go unsolved, so we’re working to mitigate future problems. We instituted “on your mat” with one on either side of the island while we prep bowls. Because Cooper is so smart, he knew exactly where he needed to go by the second meal of working on this. Emmett, well, it’s been a few months, and he’s still not entirely sure where his mat is. He usually gets close–like, in a down about six inches from the actual mat–but he doesn’t really have it. That’s okay; Cooper does, which ensures they’re still separated.
That is the only problem he’s had, though it’s a doozy. He’s gotten totally used to walking with us without a brother with him. “Cooper’s turn!” we shout as we get ready to take him for a walk or a hike or something special. He starts wagging and runs over to wait for his leash. On his doggy daycare day, he pops out of bed, raring to go even without Lucas.
I honestly think he’s just internalizing all the stress he can sense in the air, you know? He knows something’s up, but he doesn’t understand it. So he lashes out when the stress builds up. We’re running with him more (I still hate it… when does this get easier?!) and giving him puzzles to work on and extra attention when the bigs are sleeping the day away. And it’s not like this is a daily or even weekly thing. It’s just odd and upsetting.
So, that’s the Cooper update! It’s really 90% great and only this little bit bad, but of course that’s what I’m fixated on. Overall, though, I’m super proud of the little bean. He’s come out of his shell in many ways already, and I know the more we practice getting him to be confident on his own, the better he’ll do!
Glad to see Cooper get his day. I’ve been thinking about him. IIRC, he was the first pup Honey met at BlogPaws and I’ve always had a soft spot for the little noodle.
It sounds like you’ve found some good management techniques for the fights with Emmett and Cooper. So sorry you’ve had to deal with this. It is horrible to see two dogs you love fight.
Reading about Cooper has made me think of my brother-in-law. My husband is a childhood cancer survivor and I’m sure his younger brother found it really tough to have everyone taking care of his sick brother.
Cooper is doing great under really stressful circumstances as are all of you.
It seems to me that you’ve hit the nail on the head: Cooper lashes out when the stress builds up (beyond the point where he can deal with it internally). It’s horrible — as Pamela said — to see two dogs you love fight. Ducky and Shadow haven’t had any arguments lately (hope I haven’t jinxed myself!), but that might be because I’ve been on hyperalert for signs from Ducky that she’s ready to “pounce”. I’d say you’re doing an admirable job with your boys. It’s not easy, especially when you have so many other issues to deal with.
After months of Marsha trying to police Hershey whenever she got ‘too excited,’ Hershey had had enough of it a few days ago. Marsha was trying to police her excitement at dinner time and Hershey went off on her. It was a full on, teeth bared, Marsha pinned to the floor, me pulling them apart, snarly. No blood was drawn (though Marsha lost some fur), and a few days later they were snuggled together on the couch. Best of all Marsha seems to have learned her lesson; it’s not a good idea to try to dominate a dog that has 40 lbs. on you!
Sweet boy. your dogs are all so lucky to have you. We’ve had a few brawls here between my boys, some resulting in blood, all over food. It’s horrific, loud, scary. (everyone eats in crates for this reason.) I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with them, and everything else life has thrown at you recently. You maintain so much grace and composure.
Teddy is very sensitive to his humans and very intelligent too. If either of us is stressed by life he definitely internalizes it and sometimes does something naughty as a result. I hope once Cooper gets used to a new normal that this behavior dies down for you. Sounds like you know your pups inside and out and are doing the very best for each of them. They are lucky to have you!
I agree with the other posts. It seems the more sensitive/intelligent they are, the more stressed they can get. I’ve been lucky with my pack. They all know where their bowls are and only eat out of their own bowls. Thankfully, no hording food or other food related issues. Except, with Milah (Border Collie, very high strung), she has this issue that developed after Justice came into our lives. Any time I feed the cats or say anything about feeding the cats, she wants to herd Justice, or any cat that is around. She doesn’t herd my senior YaYa because she knows she will get a snap. I don’t know what that means exactly, but I can call her on it and she will lay down, but it is annoying. From your posts, it appears that Cooper is coming along well!!
I definitely think the more sensitive/intelligent dogs seem to get more stressed out – and the way it shows itself is always a bit perplexing. I think Cooper is doing great all things considered, all of your guys are lucky to have you. To know that you’re taking the time to help make the situation easier on everyone in such chaos is amazing.
I think you have things pretty well figured out, and that you are doing all you can to make things as best as possible for everyone. There’s no way you can hide every bit of stress from Cooper, so he is bound to pick up on it, as sensitive as he is. It certainly seems like sensitive and smart can go hand in hand (or paw in paw) quite often. Hang in there…you certainly have a lot to deal with, and you both handle it quite well.
The boys having any disagreements would weigh so heavily on me, even when everyone else was easy going and saying ‘it happens, don’t worry’. Uh, not in our house! But I wonder if Cooper’s reaction isn’t to something about Lucas. I only suggest it because when Max took a turn health wise, Melvin had some (and yes this is my own made up term) non-threatening aggression when around Max (almost in a hey, you up there, i’m acting out so you know that something is up) and Jake did the same thing with Melvin. Granted I only had two dogs each time, but both behaviors happened when critical turns happened health wise. Either way, spats are stressful! Especially when so much is already going on. Hoping for easier, fight free days for you guys!
Ah, what a good boy Coop. I agree with your assessment, and everyone else’s. Stress and the energy in the house – they can’t help but internalize it. It’s time’s like this you wish they understood english so you could explain. Sounds like you have a good plan and all that activity has got to help him release some energy too. Good luck.
Dog fights usually sound a lot worse than they are and when it’s two of your own, it’s heartbreaking. It sounds to me like you have a good idea of why it’s happening and how to control it.
I’m still sorry that you are going through it though.
What a great analysis of the problem and development of solutions! Cooper sounds like the sort of dog you will spend a lifetime trying to manage the anxieties with. Still, so long as he is either food or contact motivated you can always work toward improvement with careful management.
That you have seen the fights flare near dinner time is no surprise – even dogs that never resource guard have heightened stress/anxiety levels around food.
Keep up the good work!
Poor guy. I agree too, stress contributes quite a bit. You can do it!!