If my dogs wrote Yelp reviews

3 out of 3! I got to the restaurant without a reservation. It said dinner at 6, but I arrived at 4 because I really hoped they’d feed me. Since I was there. Staring at them. But, they didn’t. However, the kibble here is exceptional. It was a nice, full bowl decorated artfully with coconut oil and supplement powders. Despite the 2-hour wait, every bite is worth it. –EM., Bloomington, IN

I booked this all-inclusive resort and spa because the reviews were so good – and it didn’t disappoint. The grounds are spectacular. A great balance between grass to chomp on and dirt to roll in. They’ll cook you anything you want. I ate boiled potatoes, apples, quinoa, steamed veggies, and ground lamb for every meal. It was divine. There are all sorts of activities you can sign up for like walks in the park and jogging, along with couch snuggles and naps anytime you feel like it. Plus, they offer the most luxurious spa experience where they put a bunch of sheets and towels in the washer and dryer, then when it comes out it smells really good and is super soft and warm, so before they put it away you can roll in it and take a nap in it and lie on the pile and lick your feet. Heavenly. I will definitely be going back. –String Bean, Bloomington, IN

There is eating and playing and walking and sleeping and scratching and ear-rubbing. This place is the best, dude. –Bro Dawg, Bloomington, IN

The beds are lumpy and the breakfast is supposed to be served by 7 am but often came at 7:02, 7:05, and on one particularly horrible morning 7:30. Also, the bellhops are stinky and they sometimes lick my face, which is offensive and gets their gross smell on me. The only reason I’m giving this one star instead of no stars is because the innkeepers scratched my ears for the nine seconds I wanted them scratched. –N. T. Bloomington, IN